Father's Day 2025

Father’s Day 2025

It’s interesting being 76 years old and counting. Still living, active…though a little slower than I was when I was 40, there are certain things that hit me that I did not see coming.  This Father’s Day was one of them. I have often thought that Father’s Day was an afterthought to Mother’s Day and not taken very seriously.  Just a boost to Hallmark, but not necessarily to florists. 

There is not much to say about my Dad growing up.  Our relationship was not good.  He left home for another and then a year later, died tragically.  I was a boy who became the man of the house at age 11.  There was nothing good that I could say about him.  But years later, I had a God encounter that connected me to my Dad, that changed my life.

In brief, I was walking down from my fraternity house on my way to class.  At the corner of Limestone and Rose Lane, everything literally stopped. Everything. And God asked me three questions.  The same question each time.  “Quentin, do you have anything you need to do?” The first and second time, I said “no” while a little shocked that He spoke to me and then wondered why He would ask me such a question. But the third time, God preveniently placed the answer in my heart, and so when He asked the third time (God operates in threes with me), I blurted out an answer that surprised even me.  “God”, I said, “I need to tell my father that I love him.”  I was surprised because up until that moment I did not love my father because of what he did to my mother and to me. In all honesty, I hated Him. His departure disrupted my life.  I do not remember being a teenager. However, in the midst of my struggles without a father, I was keenly aware of God’s presence in my life.

Well, after I answered that question on God’s third try, there was a pause, then He spoke to me again.  “Quentin, I told your Dad that you love him and (then a brief pause as to let that sink in) God added: “and he loves you, too.”  That is the first time I remembered my father ever telling me that he loved me. I was shocked, almost…oh, what can I say….. discombobulated……. I struggled at first to accept what God had said, but His words infused my heart with love and a compassion that I never had before, for my father and I wept and still do today. 

I wondered why that had happened then? Then, later, God revealed it to me. (1) to let me know that my Dad was in Heaven when all these years I thought he was in hell.  (2) God knew His plans for me in the future: to continue to love and then marry Becky, (3) to be called into His ministry and be a pastor, and (4) to have children, Ginny and Adam. And this is the clincher: God had these plans for me, and He knew I could not honor them if I hated anyone, especially my father.

Loving my Dad was not hard to do after that because God loved him and he was with Him in Heaven. And to this day, I look forward to being with our Heavenly Father and my Dad in Heaven. In the meantime, I came to a saving relationship with God through Christ, and He interceded as my Father when He adopted me. It was then Jesus became my brother and the Holy Spirit as my guide. I survived to this day.

So, since that encounter with God and my Dad, through Him, Father’s Day has been special to me, just to me.  Yes, it’s nice to be recognized in the family as the father (and now the oldest father alive), but I should be the one celebrating because being Becky’s husband, I became a father by God’s grace, and he has blessed us (me) with two wonderful children, Ginny and Adam and six grandchildren.    

So after Ginny and Adam moved out to go to college, I began longing to see them.  They are our children, and I am their Dad.  In fact, I told them to always call me Dad because they were the only two people in the world that can do that and it be the truth. Anyone can call me “Quentin”, but only two can call me “Dad”. 

So as we approached this Father’s Day, I wanted no special recognition, but just to be with Adam and, if so, Ginny, who lives in Statesboro, GA. However, she won’t be able to come until later. But at River Landing, we have very nice restaurants, and Becky sought to invite Adam and Elizabeth, and his daughter Ainsley, to a 1 p.m. lunch, but then some others were invited as well. My reaction was not Christ-like.  I wanted Adam and his family to  themselves.  He is my son, and I am his father.  To be with the son and daughter that I love so much is so much better than a large group.  But finally, God got to me. I grew up a little more and am looking forward to our time together.

But I tried to surmise why I  felt so unChristian about this.  One, I am a sinner who at times wants to hoard all that God has blessed me with to myself, and secondly, I’m jealous of my time with my two children. Part is due to my age, my near-death experience, living at RL where fathers and grandfathers die more frequently because they are the same age as I am or older. This makes me acknowledge the reality of how close I am to death, and so I don’t have time or opportunities to waste. But when it is all said and done, Adam and Ginny were blessings to Becky and me, and specifically to me as their father. It is God who made this possible, but Ginny and Adam are blessings to so many, extended family and friends included. 

And so, on Father’s Day, I give thanks for Dad, for my (our) son and daughter, and their children, our grandchildren; and of course, for Becky who helped me through the times, as this one, that I was not as good a father as God intended for me to be. 

So, in Sunday’s worship (Trinity Sunday), I prayed this prayer:

Almighty and merciful God, you know the thoughts of my heart.  I confess that I have sinned against You and done evil in Your sight.  I have transgressed Your holy laws.  I have disregarded Your Word and Sacraments.  Forgive me, O Lord.  Give me grace and power to put away all hurtful thoughts and things, that, being delivered from the bondage of sin, I may bring forth fruit worthy of repentance, and from henceforth may ever walk in Your holy ways; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.  

Quentin

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